Forest band an an old train-and some old girl angst

So I wanted very badly to get sheep garden, sent an order to closet child, but it was sold out in shop. (Well, I think it's a totally undervalued print, and I do hope to get it one day.)

So I got this one instead. It's kinda typical IW sweet-classic I really like. I've been wanting to expand my classic wardrope. Classic is the style I originally fell most in love with. There is social pressure for an older loli to definitely not go for the sweet, but classic is the formal best choice. (Well, I've never really bought the idea one should pick just one of the main styles, that almost seems to become a part of one's identity. But unfortunately the wallet does set some limits.) Maybe that's also why the little rebel in me doesn't want to completely give up on sweet and is now fixated on those fluffy sheep..To prove that age is just a number and I don't care. And because I think healthy adulthood is just taking care of your responsibilities well, not becoming more boring by blending in more, because of a fear of what other people might think. I've been trying to find another better reason one should "tone down" one's style, but I really can't think of one.

Some people keep insisting it's an aesthetic thing, but I think it really is a social contruct we are just brainwashed into. There were days when jewels and lace were the more appropriate thing for older married women, not younger girls.

One could also think younger prettier maidens don't need to be so ornamental, as they are still so pretty just as their plain selves. So do we think we need to make what we do culturally view as unattractive signs of old age even uglier, by saying pretty things don't suit them? Beauty- who needs it? Doesn't everyone? Isn't it just "good for the soul"? I don't mean in a vain "I want to be admired" way. (A bit of vanity is a victimless sin, if you ask me...) But also in being at peace with yourself by harmony of what is on the outside and what you want to be on the inside kind of way?

I've also heard a quote about lolita that "a pretty girl doesn't need a dress like that." But I wouln't say the western lolita culture really tolerates any kind of ugliness, at least the prettier the better. And maybe some people think who am I to complain, (at least I think) lookwise I still should pass for late 20 something...Or that's what I think to justify my sweet side. But I think it's sad that I am not so free of social preasure that I just really really don't care enough to not to even bother having the thought cross my mind. When I was younger people told me it's ok to be a little eccentric, because young people are looking for who they are. Apparently after having found your eccentric self, some people think loosing it and conforming is the more mature thing to do. And I wonder what exactly is the right age to "loose yourself", but I'm definetly getting a message by 30 something one should have done it.

Maybe the museum piece of a cart of an old steam train would actually suit the subject. Museum pieces stillhave some charm. I want a pink rollator and the very lacy "granny headdress". And then I'm going to use that rollator, to roll down a hill really fast flashing a bit of petticoats and bloomers...